Lâcher prise

Happy New Year, health, happy moments, harmony and peace.  

Nice day today, a lot of love and generosity from people and from me to me.

It's sometimes strange how I have no illusions left, I believe in love but no longer about being loved by someone else, I mean love stronger than friendship love, I mean like in a couple love.  I don't even know if I want it really, I love seeing it and witnessing love given by a loved one to his or her soulmate.

I feel I'm too old for that now and no longer able of loving as I have loved, with desire, respect and empathy.  

Sometimes I'd love a hug from someone dear, I miss that, being hugged and embraced.  

Today, a nice lady in the coffee shop where I sometimes have a coffee, offered me some soup, bread and tea.  She said it was for the new year, she is kind like a mother.   She cares a lot for people, and she's natural and spontaneous.

I also chatted with Sekou, a guy (who looks gay) who lives in London and designs costumes for the movie industry.  He comes from Mali and was very outgoing and talkative.  We exchanged about his life, mine, the differences between Paris and London as far as mentalities are concerned.

Steph is in Paris until Friday morning, it's nice, she knows how to find the words to reassure.  Manue and Steph offered me very nice presents, I love them, they are so kind and dear to me, like sisters I never had.  

I finished watching a 3 episode series about an ex-convict who goes out of jail after 12 years sentence for armed robbery and who goes back to his family and must learn again to live in the outside world. A very realistic and moving series with a very good casting.  I cried when watcbing it, the dialogs are very well written, it's a moving and sincere story of self-redemption, reassessing one's way of life, being able to change and become a good, kind and loving person.  A very nice modern tale and a deep belief in human change and becoming good, selfless and caring.